Van Halen frontman David Lee Roth has responded to rumors his band will perform at the next Super Bowl with an open letter stating that while they have not been offered such a gig, they would quickly say yes if asked.

Which, should be everything the NFL needs to know, short of a mailing address with which to send the band a blank check. Unless they’re determined to make us watch more neon LED-lit robot dancing pop nonsense. (Sorry, we’re still a bit bitter about that one.)

In an open letter first published at the never-sleeping Van Halen News Desk, Roth starts off by saying, “First of all let me say this — be still my pigskin heart. That honor has not been bestowed upon us at this time though it is one we would accept in a NY minute.”

He then launches on a typically Roth-ian and highly amusing stream-of-consciousness spiel about football stadiums, bad Oliver Stone movies, his fading memory and Hebrew school rituals before getting back down to brass tacks:

We are not on Commissioner Goodell’s dance card at this time, but we would be most honored to dance the halftime away in New Orleans. It’s an honor to be considered and for that we would like to thank the rumormongers all over the World Wide Web.”

You can read David Lee Roth’s entire Super Bowl open letter right here. Van Halen just wrapped up their somewhat abbreviated U.S. tour in support of their reunion album ‘A Different Kind of Truth,’ but are expected to perform in Australia and Japan later in the year.

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